I want to know if my life experiences would tell you anything about how good I look. I've always been wondering if I'm average (There's not even a slight possibility that I'm ugly, what I mean by average is not that pretty but not hard to look at), a bit above average or if I'm properly pretty. If I'm plain and not pretty at all it does bother me a bit but I just wanna know if my life experiences here mean anything or if I should just already know how good I look without having to ask the internetI do like my own face and body. Things that made me doubt myself was a girl calling me the ugliest girl in class in high school who was meant to be a friendly acquaintance to me, boys acting like I'm gross and implying I'm ugly in high school, and a boyfriend in the past who told me that I'm not pretty at all and would always tell me pretty girls turn him on and which girls he thinks are pretty, after him the thought of looking at another girl even was painful - those incidents really get me down and put my self esteem way down and make me feel like trash. Those times really made me feel like a hideous creature looking thing. I've also had lots of positive feedback though and been told I'm hot and attractive a lot so it's not all bad in my life.I've had some compliments from total strangers like walk up to tell me I look so pretty a few times in my life. Also once on some public forum thing some person said I'm the hottest girl in a party, there was a party with like 20 girls and some random internet stranger said I was the prettiest.I've had some friends tell me that after their other friend sees me for the first time they say that I'm gorgeous or cute after meeting me. It doesn't ALWAYS happen but a few times it has.I had a few serious relationships and engaged but broke it off oncr almost been married as Im now in my 20sI'm sorry if anyone thinks this is disgusting but I'm a sex worker too and I almost never had a guy reject me when I was working privately, and they compliment me like wow you're stunning, beautiful, definitely high class escort material. They say Im hot and there's lots of trashy girls out there. They say they don't think they'd have a chance to sleep with me otherwise outside of this. They all tell me I'm good looking or very good looking or stunning. I think they mean t!! Some of the boys are very good looking young boys too. Some of the guys who wanted to sleep with me and tell me I'm very beautiful are movie star model good looking They tell me I'm gorgeous and so hot and they tell me exactly which girls they think Im prettier than or on a comparable scale to. When I worked in brothels I was usually very popular too and was always busier than most females working.I do pretty well with boys almost all would sleep with me I can have a handsome boyfriend who adores me I want one, but I've been told I'm the ugliest girl in our high school before and that one boyfriend who told me I'm not pretty and constantly talked abouy other pretty girls - his words scarred me and hurt me forever.In high school there really was a difference in how I got treated - it's not all in my head. I can't see if I changed in looks or people just were nicer but I definitely got told I'm pretty more often by people (but especially guys) and guys I knew socially started telling me I'm beautiful pretty instead of being all akward and avoiding or ignoring me.The boyfriend who told me Im not pretty was being honest - no othet agenda I think but his words make me feel like trash forever. The girl in high school and the boys who treated me like the ugliest girl in high school were also just being honest! It wasn't jealousy, they were just making fun of/pointing out how ugly they think I look. But they made me believe I'm exceptionally ugly looking and made me feel ashamed of how I look via /r/Advice http://ift.tt/2rJSlLg
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